Heavy Heart

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I’m so sad. And I can’t really figure out why. I haven’t been in to the holidays this year. I haven’t decorated nor gone to parties. {Although we did have one I was excited about attending on Saturday and I ended up having stomach issues.} I’ve given advice on how to get out of a funk such as this, but I can’t seem to follow it myself right now. There’s a gut-wrenching pit deep within my stomach.

What’s more is that I feel guilty feeling this way.

With all that has happened on Friday to the innocent children, staff, families and the community of Newtown, Connecticut, I feel like I don’t have a right to feel this way. I can’t even begin to fathom what these people are going through. And my heart goes out to them. Perhaps that is part of the sadness I’m feeling??

I am going to try to take the rest of this day and fill it with gratitude. I’m going to have to reach deep. I owe it to those who’ve lost so much this holiday season. Whatever I’m feeling doesn’t begin to compare to how others are grieving right now.

I’ve written and rewritten this post so many times and can’t seem to convey the sympathies I want to express to all those affected. My heart is heavy. It’s difficult to go on writing my normal posts thinking how silly they sound when so many hearts are breaking. How do we move on?

Please take some time these final two weeks of 2012, to cherish those family members and hug them a little tighter like so many parents are doing with their children right now. Be grateful for those in your life.

Despite this tragedy, I want to wish everyone hope and peace this holiday season, as well as the fight to carry on.

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